Attempt
Some of you have come here looking for information on technology, on CSS, on design. That’s here, I promise, (in fact, skip down a few posts and you’ll find it), but sometimes I am willing to sacrifice visitors who are uninterested in my life. Now is one of those times, one of the times I feel that I should share what I am thinking, even if it is in a slightly vague manner. After all, I can not post everything I am thinking here; stream of consciousness is very hard to read, even in small doses. I ask only that you allow me the luxury of self-expression in the most organized way I can muster at this point in time.
I had a post in the making, saved in a text file called “Untitled,” which began what I thought I wanted to say:
Call me melodramatic, but the rapidity with which it all occurred reminded of something from Shakespeare. I will leave it up to you to decide the play to which I might be referring …
I left and went to watch the movie Love Actually; which changed how I was thinking. Afterwards, I realized I did not want to supply an account of what happened to me on Tuesday and Wednesday - the crazy move-out and the improbable rendezvous. No, I wanted to express the way I was affected by those events. To the few cough Caley cough who know the entire story back to front, inside out, and upside down, thanks for putting up with me. I still very very much have my head about me and I am never one to blow out of proportion or rush that which should not be rushed.
This paragraph marks my third time back to this post: I’ve weeded a lot out - that alone says something. I only edit my thoughts when I feel that I have something big to say. I realized, for attempt three, poetry is the best medium with which to describe the situation.
Unsuspecting, Tuesday brought knowledge of events unknown
Singing in the shower, semester’s end was near, I didn’t know something was beginning, too
Beginning as a distraction growing to reaction and forming into action
Thoughts swirled about in a slow motion tornado
Slip into high gear, pound the clutch, and turn on the strobe lights
Up and down five flights of stairs, gotta be ready
Computers, stereos, and old covered chairs
Singing again in the shower, a different tune
After “hello?” came “we’re on our way” and the nerves kicked in
Sweaty palms, don’t forget to smile
Crossed fingers behind my back as I opened the door
You really did? A white owl, a white wave
Swept me clean
A permanent grin took to my face
CapriSun really is refreshing
While arranging candy glass on glass
Thinking how lucky and blessed a person can be
Despite my best efforts, I remain confounded, trying to say what I am thinking. It’s the best feeling I’ve had in some time. I certainly would recommend it.